How depth psychology helps you understand yourself on a deeper level

What do we actually mean when we say that we want to "understand ourselves"? (or, going beyond CBT)

Everyone wants to "know themselves better"– or so we tell ourselves. Shelves upon shelves are filled at bookstores devoted to self-help and personal development. We read books, attend courses, and listen to podcasts that promise they'll help us finally understand ourselves.

But behaviourist-style therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioural therapy (DBT) have become so incredibly prominent over the last few decades that it seems like they're the only psychological approach left. When done well, these therapies do include plenty of nuance– they're not purely behaviouralism. But it's all too easy for these therapies to lose their nuance, and become flat, superficial versions of themselves. In the wrong hands, these therapies can become "just behave differently, and your thoughts and feelings will follow. If you're not 'cured,' you're doing it wrong. Try harder." If you've had the misfortune of doing CBT or DBT delivered from this kind of perspective? You may have left therapy (or finished reading a workbook, or listening to an audio course) feeling worse about yourself than when you started.

Behaviourism has its place, absolutely. There is plenty to appreciate about the contribution of behaviourism in psychology. But pretending that behaviourism is psychology, full stop, is doing everyone a disservice.

It's hard to understand yourself– and especially hard to have compassion for yourself– when you're being told that your thoughts and feelings and behaviours are, simply put, wrong. When you fill out worksheet after worksheet questioning the evidence for your every "wrong" thought? How can you trust yourself when you spend hours in therapy or self-help delineating in a cool, organized, clinical context just how wrong your every reaction seems to be?

How depth psychology is different: looking under the surface of everyday life

Depth psychology is a broad term. Grounded in the work of psychiatrist C. G. Jung, depth psychology is a psychological theory that explores the relationship between the conscious and unconscious mind, as well as the patterns and dynamics that motivate us. Once we better understand the fears, desires, patterns, and hopes that drive us in our everyday lives, we have a greater chance of being able to change them.

To put it another way– instead of rummaging around blindly in a bag for an item, doing depth psychology works helps us to take all the items out of the bag, and carefully examine them under the light to find what we're looking for.

What does psychodynamic mean, and how is it related to depth psychology?

Freud first developed the concept of dynamic forces at play in the human mind, or psyche: hence psychodynamic, which Jung and later depth psychology practitioners have built upon. Psychiatrist Dr. Irvin Yalom provides an excellent definition of psychodynamic:

[The term psychodynamic] is rooted in Freud's model of mental functioning, positing that forces in conflict within the individual generate the individual's thought, emotion, and behaviour. Furthermore– and this is a crucial point– these conflicting forces exist at varying levels of awareness: indeed some are entirely unconscious.

-Irvin Yalom, The Gift of Therapy (2002), p. xvi

The role of the unconscious in understanding ourselves

Depth psychology theorizes that we are all motivated by desires, experiences, and preferences that aren't obvious to us. These unnamed/unnoticed assumptions can come from our personal experiences, our family histories, and our cultural background. We can distinguish between that which we know/are aware of versus things we don't know as "conscious" versus "unconscious."

A major part of the work of depth psychology is to make the unconscious conscious– in other words, to help us become more aware of those quiet yet persistent internal forces within our psyche that influence our emotions, our reactions, our decisions, and how we show up in the world.

Why do we repeat old patterns? An explanation from depth psychology

Have you ever noticed that you keep having the same fight again and again with your husband? Or that you keep getting stuck with frustrating bosses that seem to share the same irritating personality type, no matter whether you change jobs, organizations, or fields? Do you sometimes feel like you're starring in your own personal Groundhog Day movie, doomed to repeat the same conversations and conflicts over and over again?

C. G. Jung termed these recurring patterns of behaviours "complexes." Although you may be somewhat familiar with Freud's Oedipal complex, Jung's theory of complexes is much broader and more individual. In Jung's view, which was expanded upon by later contributors to the field of depth psychology, complexes based on an individual person's background and life experiences are extremely common. As long as these complexes are allowed to continue unconsciously, they drive self-defeating thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. After being examined (brought to light, as it were) and worked on, these complexes can be successfully resolved, leading towards greater wholeness.

Shadow work: how to recognize the parts of ourselves we hide away

One concept from depth psychology that seems to be getting a fair amount of current attention is the idea of shadow work. I've devoted a full post to the topic of shadow work, but to address it briefly here...

When we look at our shadow, it means that we are looking beneath the surface to the parts of ourselves that we're uncomfortable with. It could be our anger, our selfishness, our inability to get things done, our procrastination.

Our shadow self shows up when we find ourselves rooting through the cupboards for a bag of chips after a day of whole foods and home-cooked meals.

Our shadow self shows up when there's that one colleague at work who gets under your skin no matter what they do or say.

Our shadow self shows up when we're having the same tired old argument for the thousandth time with our partner, and yet we can't seem to step away.

When we do shadow work—carefully grounded in the concepts of depth psychology—and while holding plenty of space and compassion for ourselves as we do this difficult work, we can get to know ourselves on a deeper level and work towards greater wholeness and integration.

What depth psychology, self-compassion, and mindfulness share

Strictly speaking, the concepts of self-compassion and mindfulness come out of a different intellectual tradition than the concepts of depth psychology. Mindfulness and self-compassion are grounded in more Eastern philosophical traditions and Buddhism, and were popularized in the West by psychologists including Tara Brach, Kristin Neff, Jon Kabat-Zinn, Jack Kornfield, and Paul Gilbert, amongst many others.

Even though they technically spring out of a different tradition, I think that the concepts of mindfulness and self-compassion integrate beautifully with the broader framework of depth psychology. C. G. Jung was himself very interested in Eastern concepts such as meditation and yoga, and I think that shared intellectual and philosophical tradition comes through in his work in depth psychology. One of the goals of depth psychology work is the idea of reaching a point of self-acceptance and compassion (both towards yourself and to others), after achieving greater self awareness and understanding through depth psychology.

Is depth psychology right for you?

Depth psychology isn't for everyone, and isn't for every season of life. Other psychological approaches like CBT, DBT, or ACT, to name just a few, have plenty to offer in certain clinical circumstances. But for the right patient, at the right time, depth psychology can be an excellent fit.

Depth psychology might be right for you if:

• You're a deep thinker, who enjoys diving into big concepts.
• You're a creative sort– an artist, a writer, a musician. Even if (especially if) you hesitate to apply that label to yourself.
• You're a reflective person.
• People have called you an "old soul" since you were young.
• You feel at home in the spiritual aspect of life.
• You're on the threshold of big life changes (a career shift, a change in family circumstances, a milestone birthday coming up).
• You want to create a practice of listening to your inner self.

Did this pique your interest? Does this resonate with you on a deeper, perhaps more soulful, level than some of the other work you've done?

If you'd like to learn more about depth psychology, you can join my newsletter to find out when my upcoming applied courses on concepts from depth psychology (including topics such as feminine archetypes, dark feminine, and shadow work) are offered.